tails to Paris

I’ve been bitter about love for too long now. I’ve been cranky since February, and I need that to end now.

Lately, I’ve had the itch to fall in love and spend the rest of my life with a man who respects and adores me. I long to meet a pair of eyes across a room and know he feels the same sort of butterflies as I do. I’d like to start planning a future for life after school with someone who wants to spend the rest of his life by my side.

It’s all good things I desire, but the rest of my thoughts have not been kind or pure. I am tired of glaring at couples without even meaning to, or not appreciating the beauty that love can be in other people. I have been coveting a relationship, and that is so not good.

I am comfortable in being single right now, but that does not give me the right to let my heart drop whenever I see a friend with his or her significant other. A couple in love is a dear and precious thing, and I want to be the sort of person who smiles at that little miracle.

Even more than I want to hold someone’s hand, I want to be known for having a joy that comes from Jesus and that spills onto everyone I meet. More than a relationship, I want to be trusted with my friends’ triumphs and trials and joys and heartbreaks, and to always encourage and uplift them.

I don’t have time to pretend to vomit whenever I see a couple walking around campus, but I do have time to smile at them and thank God that He gives some blessed souls a hand to hold in this life.

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