who holds the stars

Who is God?

He is the one who comforts me, the one who created the stars and the sky and the earth. He is the Lord, the one who gives me breath and always has His hand on me. He created everything and He calls me His own child.

Who am I?

I am one who will not die and will not starve, for He is the Lord and He is my Maker. I am His vessel and I do not go on in this life in haste or in vain, for He goes before me even while He is behind me, urging me on. He will not leave me, even when I do not feel Him, and He will not forget me, even when I go days without calling on Him for wisdom and strength.

What has God promised to me?

That though this whole earth falls apart and all I hold dear fails, His love for me will not end. He promises to always be at peace with me and to have compassion on me. It is funny in a sad and good way that when my heart is broken, just like that Psalm, is when I cry to God in the most sincere way. He is my Father and He holds me always, even when my fickle heart is distracted for a time. He is my Redeemer from old and I am His chosen one, the one sought after and molded by His hands.

-*-

I wrote the above in a journal entry back in October. Since that night, when God did His thing and His Spirit made my weak heart feel peaceful, I have had to preach those promises to myself daily. More often than not it’s multiple times throughout the day, from brushing my teeth to walking to class to almost breaking down about finances and my girls. Worry and faith have been wrestling my heart to pieces and it has not been easy to repeat God’s promises over and over to bring momentary peace to the struggle.

The last ten chapters of Isaiah have been a great comfort to me during this time of doubt and worry. I have never wanted more to hug an ancient prophet before this past month. I have never before needed such daily reassurance of God’s faithfulness. I haven’t been this weak in a long time, but maybe it’s about time I needed Him again.

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