if I’m being real honest

Sunburnt skin flaking off my forehead. Sophomores who rest their heads on my shoulder. Blistered feet and no tub to soak them in. Friends who listen to my bitter words and chide me with love. A pair of extroverts who are trying out this whole married thing (and definitely succeeding). Puddles on the bathroom floor and photos of Paris on my door and a lumpy futon that will support many sorry bottoms over the next eight months.

I reflect on these aspects of the year so far and all I can think of is humility and sanctification. Humility, because I am a sinner who says horrid things and has a temper that sometimes vomits on those she loves best but God still uses my sorry self to glorify His Name. Sanctification, because it is hard to be a human with aching bones and a wandering heart but God has given His Spirit as an assurance that, one glorious day, the struggle with sin will be over and I will be wholly pure in His presence.

Hallelujah, death is overcome
And we are breathing
Hallelujah our stone hearts become flesh
A flesh that’s beating
Hallelujah chains have been undone
And we are singing
Hallelujah the fire has begun
Can you feel it?

| Tenth Avenue North, The Struggle

I read the book of Hosea last night and today, and was stunned for the umpteenth time at God’s redemptive work in humans and His tireless love. We fight our way through life, pushing back against temptations, failing along the way……but God is beside us through it all, gifting us with the breath and grace we need for each day. We don’t love Him as we should, but His fiery presence walked through the carcasses of animals to seal the covenant with an old man whose descendants would be the stars and so we are free.

We won’t always be Gomer, and that is a beautiful promise.

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